Amnesia
by bleachUlquiGrimm
Summary: Grimmjow did something bad. Now Ulquiorra has amnesia! Luckily, Grimmjow has Halibel and Nnoitra to back him up! Read the craziness that follows! Review please ;D
1. Ulquiorra's Somewhat Simple Task

Ulquiorra's Somewhat Simple Task

Today had to be one of the most unfulfilling, tedious days to ever take place in Hueco Mundo. It was after the war, and we the Espada were just doing our own thing. We just laid back and relaxed and other kinds of stuff. As for me, the Cuatro Espada, things remained busy. It seemed I had more work than ever before to do. I sigh. It was my job to clean everything you could imagine in your pitiful minds, I had to organize all of the meetings we would have from now on, and I was Gin's PA, personal assistant. I cannot even calculate how it is that I wound up with that job, but I shan't complain. I never complain, for that would be out of my nature and quite futile. I would just grin and bear it. I never really smiled, so it was more like, I would frown and bear it. Today was no different from any other days. I had to get up at six in the morning and wake up the rest of the Espada at their preferred times. I had to wash the dirty uniforms. Not to mention, clean the bathrooms only Aizen, Gin, and Tousen needed. It was a real pain in the ass, excuse my language. I went on to clean the rest of Las Noches and do any other task that needed to be done. This was a job that required a lot of patience. Patience was a virtue. That was a load of…well, you know. Anyway, I had to clean Aizen's room since he managed to mess it up everyday always looking for the Hogyoku he now insisted on keeping in his room. I went in and picked up the sprawled out clothes, brushes, and knick knacks. I had to clean up the dirt from the plants he had thrown around. Finally, I was done. Now, since I threatened every Espada whose room wasn't cleaned, I was done. Then a certain blue haired piece of trash came walking by. He smiled at me.

"Hey, you mind cleaning my room?"

I gave him my pissed yet emotionless look.

"I told you that you're responsible for the cleanliness of your room." I said picking up a sock I somehow missed. Grimmjow walked in the room and placed his hand firmly on my shoulder.

"C'mon! What's it going to hurt to just clean my room this once?"

Another look. He shook his head.

"What are you so busy doing that you can't clean it?"

"I was about to go to the World of the Living to, uh."

"If you even try to lie, I will eviscerate your bowels and chop of your nuts."

Grimmjow backed away from me with fear on his face.

"Not my boys…" He moaned. I put my hands in my pockets.

"Try me."

He looked up then back at me.

"I'm going to Hot Topic." He sighed. I stared incredulously at him. If anyone deserved to go to Hot Topic, it was me. I loved that store!

"Can you clean it?"

"Absolutely not."

"WHY!? I want a new tee!"

"You can get one after you clean your room."

He growled and kicked my shin. Realizing what he had done, he looked at my face with even wider, more fear-filled eyes. I looked at him with a Death Glare, more powerful than the Death Note itself. He put his hands up waving them around.  
"Whoa, whoa, Ulquiorra…Let's be calm."

"Run."

He turned around and darted out of the room with me hot on his heels. He was puffing. I ran without effort. Keeping up with him was no simple matter. We pushed several pieces of trash that were in the hallway out of our way. He opened the door to his room. Just as I was about to come in and trap him, he slammed the door hitting me hard enough to knock me out.

ULQUI'S OUT COLD!!!!! Oh snap. I can bet a certain blue haired Espada is in trouble when Ulqui wakes up. HEE HEE HEE.

Please Review! Thanx! ^_^


	2. Oh Won't You Take Me toCrazy Town!

Oh Won't You Take Me to…Crazy Town!

Oh man. That was a pretty hard crack I heard just now. Ulquiorra had been chasing me, and I do think I just hit him with the door. It wasn't on purpose! I swear my life! I was not about to lose my boys now. I hope he wasn't too pissed. I opened the door slowly expecting to see a pissed off Ulquiorra at the door. Instead, I saw Ulquiorra lying on the ground completely helpless and out cold. Oh shit, that door must have hit him harder than I thought. Shit, shit, shit, what if Aizen found out I had killed Ulquiorra? I would be dead next! No, he wasn't dead thank Aizen! He was just out cold. That was it. What do I do now? Do I help him even though he was just trying to kill me just now? I sneer. He got what he deserved. I heard a loud gasp. Nnoitra was pointing at Ulquiorra's unconscious body, and Halibel was glaring at me.

"What did you _do_?" She demanded an answer. I scratched the back of my head.

"I didn't do nothin'!"

Nnoitra looked at me from the corner of his eye. He chuckled a low, raspy kind of chuckle.

"You finally stood up for yourself and gave him the old one, two, eh?"

"N-no! He would kill me later if I did that." This was very true, but I had always wanted to knock Ulquiorra out. It was just my dumb luck I actually did it. It wasn't even in a fight to the death how I wanted it to be. Halibel was knelt down next to Ulquiorra.

"He is alive, that's for sure. Thank goodness."

Nnoitra frowned.

"I guess it is pretty damn lucky you didn't kill him, or Aizen would have poned your babies."

I nodded.  
"Should we try to wake him up?" I said gulping. Nnoitra smiled; Halibel nodded. She sort of picked him up and tapped him lightly. His eyes fluttered until they were opened all nice and emotionless again. I sighed with my hand over my heart. The other two sighed in relief as well.

"Are you okay, Ulquiorra?" She asked. He blinked.

"Who the hell is Ulquiorra?" He said. We all choked on the air in that instant. I started hyperventilating.

"D-did….he….just…with the…forgetting…and…confuse…?" I stuttered. Nnoitra nodded at me staring at Ulquiorra who was biting the tip of his thumb. Halibel blinked.

"Um…do you remember anything?" She asked. He closed his eyes.  
"I am…Ra!'  
"Yes, yes! UlquiorRA. Can you say that?"

"Ul-kee-ull-RA." He sounded out. Nnoitra looked like he was going to faint. My legs buckled. I landed on my knees. I took Ulquiorra by the shoulders and shook him.  
"WHY!!!!?!?!? Can't you remember anything!? Anything!? I'm Grimmjow! You hate me! You always threaten me and…and"

Ulquiorra pushed off. I looked at him. He remembered? Yes?

"I have no clue what you're talking about." He said. I could have just about cried right there. I didn't of course. I'm not some damn woman. I did rub my temples.

"So…you guys know me. Who are you?"

"I'm Grimmjow…" I sobbed.

"Halibel."

"Super Awesome Rock-and-Roll Amazo Man." Nnoitra smiled.

"Nnoitra." Halibel sighed. Ulquiorra shook his head.

"No, no, no. That's awl wrong. You have to be Bluedy, you have to be Busty, and you're Spoon Supreme." He pointed at each one of us as he listed the names. We blinked in succession.

"Are you-"

"WAFFLES!!!!!" He yelled randomly.

"What?" We asked. He rubbed his tummy and pat his head.  
"Waffles, waffles, yummy, yummy, pancakes, pancakes, funny, funny." He sang with a smile on his face. I could feel my eyes twitching. I put my hands over my eyes.

"Ulquiorra smiled! My eyes! THEY BUUUUUURRRRNNNN!!!!!!" I screamed. Halibel slapped me.

"Get a hold of yourself. We have bigger things to worry about." Halibel glared at me. Ulquiorra tapped her. She looked at him like he was the sweetest thing in the whole world.

"Yes?" she asked.

"Answer me this, I see graves three, two fathers, two sons and their all named McGee, but where is the fourth grave?" He said in a real creepy voice while moving his fingers in a creepy pattern. Halibel looked at me.

"Three graves? Two sons? Two fathers? Grimmjow? Nnoitra?"

We both shrugged. We had a crazy Ulquiorra on our hands. He was more important than some, stupid riddle.

* * *

Does ANYONE know the answer to the riddle? I do! I just remembered this from an old Teen Titans GO! comic. I was like, this _has_ to be in the story. SO. CRAZY ULQUIORRA!!!!! ^ ^


	3. Chase and Whipped Cream

Chase and Whipped Cream

This was the worst day ever. I had woke up, done my hair, and met Nnoitra outside so we could take a romantic walk around Las Noches. Instead, we were stuck helping Grimmjow with his latest screw-up. He hit Ulquiorra so hard, he had amnesia! Now, he was acting crazy. He was a madman. I still couldn't figure out that riddle! Three graves, two fathers, two sons! What madness it this!? It doesn't matter. We were having a hard time keeping our eye on the little bugger, Ulquiorra. I mean, Ra. We were running just to keep up with Ulquiorra.

"Where is he going!?" I asked Grimmjow who was keeping stride next to me. Grimmjow growled.

"I have no idea! He said something about moon men, and now this!"

Nnoitra came up from behind.

"This looks like a job for the fastest Espada in Las Noches!" He said smiling.

"Did you get Zommari?" I asked. "Maybe Starrk?"

Nnoitra almost tripped.

"ME! I'm the fastest and the strongest!!"

"Whatever you say…" Grimmjow and I rolled our eyes. Nnoitra snarled and ran ahead of us. Ulquiorra stopped suddenly causing us all to trip since none of us could stop on a dime.

"Ra! That's so stupid…Ulquiorra! Stop running around!"

He was standing perfectly still. We walked around do we could see his face. It looked like he was about to cry.

"Ah! What's wrong Ulquiorra!? What happened?"

"There are no moon men where we are." He said sniffling.

"You just realized that dumbass?" Nnoitra scoffed. Ulquiorra, still looking straight ahead, grabbed Nnoitra and pulled him close to him.

"We. Are. DEAD. No moon men." He said in his creepy voice. Nnoitra blinked. He turned his head to me.

"I'm scared." He frowned pointing at Ulquiorra. Ulquiorra released him and put his hands into his pockets. Grimmjow took his arm.

"What's up now?"

"Whipped. Cream." Ulquiorra chuckled. Well, it was more like a giggle. Shudder. Grimmjow raised an eyebrow.

"Whipped cream?"

"Give me whipped cream!!!!!" Ulquiorra cried. We all tried to calm him down. He wouldn't stop crying. This was one hell of a day. I sigh. There he goes. Ulquiorra ran off again with us trying to catch him.

"He's using his sonido to get ahead quicker!" Nnoitra groaned. I slapped him while still running.

"It doesn't matter what he's using. We have to catch him before someone else finds out."

"I know." He said.

"I am not getting in trouble because of Grimmjow's idiocy."

"It was an accident!!" Grimmjow yelled. "And, whatever. I'll just use my sonido to catch him. Here I go." He was off. He tackled Ulquiorra and held his arms behind his back. He kicked Grimmjow well…it was a place no man should be kicked. Grimmjow released Ulquiorra and fell to the ground. Nnoitra sympathized him.

"Boy, do I know how that hurts…" He said trying to comfort the aching Grimmjow. I thought. We needed to get Ulquiorra to stop running. I uncrossed my arms and cupped them around my collar-covered mouth.

"WHIPPED CREAM!!!!!" I yelled. Ulquiorra was instantly hugging me.

"Give to me whipped cream!" He giggled again.

"Alright, but we have to go to the kitchen…together."

He nodded. I smiled, though no one would see it behind the collar and the Hollow bone, but I smiled still because I was relieved Ulquiorra was done running. We all walked to the kitchen together. In a way, we looked like a happy, uncoordinated family.

We made it to the kitchen where Grimmjow handed Ulquiorra the whipped cream who in return sprayed us all and ran out with it. Both boys glared at me.

"Oh, _brilliant_ plan Halibel." They mocked me. I groaned.

"Damn Ulquiorra, well, no. It's your fault Grimmjow!"

"Excuse me for defending myself from his wrath."

"Defense? You accidentally hit him with a door." Nnoitra laughed. Grimmjow punched him; Nnoitra laughed harder.

"You are so lucky you have the toughest Hierro. SO LUCKY!" Grimmjow yelled.

"GUYS! We have to stop Ulquiorra. What if Aizen sees him?"

They both blinked, looked at each other, and gasped.

"We have to find him!!!" We all ran out of the kitchen as quick as can be.

* * *

There it is. Another perfect chapter of Ulquiorra spazzing out. Yea. I write this chapter on a grim day. Not grim, I'm just nervous. Today is the first basketball game for my school. It's varsity, coach didn't run any plays with me and my friends. We have to play. OMG. Wish me luck people. More chapters to come.


	4. Truth, No Avoiding It

Truth…No Avoiding It

This was great, just so great. I was so dead, so dead, so dead. If anyone besides Halibel and Nnoitra find out what I did, I'm screwed! I never meant to give him amnesia! I didn't! Dang…We were trying to find Ulquiorra right now. He had run out of the kitchen with whipped cream. Since he was so stupid now, he left a trail of whipped cream, so we were following that. The trail ended where the can lay. We all stared at it. Nnoitra picked it up. I felt an odd spiritual pressure at that moment. Holy crap, I was screwed. Aizen was coming towards us. He did _not_ look happy. He stopped by us, looked at the whipped cream in the wall, and the can in Nnoitra's hands. He looked up at Nnoitra's face.

"Did you leave this mess?" He asked calm. We knew he wasn't going to be calm for long. Nnoitra shook his head wildly from side to side.

"Not me Lord Aizen." He said. Aizen narrowed his eyes.

"The can is in your hands, and the trail is clear."

"It wasn't me."

"Perhaps it was an invisible purple monkey then?"

We all looked at each other then nodded. Aizen sighed.

"You can tell me if you made the mess or not. I won't get mad."

One thought was in all of our heads, I could tell. _Liar_. Nnoitra exhaled.

"It was Ulquiorra. He did it."

Aizen raised an eyebrow. He looked even angrier now.

"Ulquiorra? How can you accuse him? He is one of the most admirable Espada in Hueco Mundo. You all should be more like him."

I rolled my eyes as he spoke. No one needed to be more like Ulquiorra. He was just a kiss-up. That's all. I looked behind me because I was so tired of Aizen's talk of Ulquiorra. My eyes gleamed.

"ULQUIORRA!!!!" I pointed. Halibel and Nnoitra looked too. Halibel elbowed me.

"Idiot! Now Aizen _will_ know what you did!" She whispered harshly. I cringed.

"Damn…I forgot."

"Ulquiorra," Aizen called, "Could you come here for a second?"

Ulquiorra walked up like he normally would, hands in pockets and eyes straight. He addressed Lord Aizen.

"Can you tell me who made this mess?"

"The cream?"

"The cream."

"Yeah, that was him." He pointed at me. I gasped.

"What're you talking about you little psycho!?" I ground my teeth together. He nodded.

"I saw him."

Aizen looked at me. I shook my head. I pointed at Ulquiorra.

"Him! him! It was him!"

"Stop embarrassing yourself." Nnoitra smiled. I threatened to punch him. He backed off.

"I'm ashamed in you Grimmjow." He shook his head. "How could you blame Ulquiorra?" He turned to face Ulquiorra. He stared at Aizen, pulled out a can of that silly string, and sprayed it right in Aizen's face. Then he ran off…again. Aizen was very confused. He held the same pose except the string was there in his face. He wiped it away and looked at us.

"What…just…happened?" He blinked.

"Um…Ulquiorra stringed you?" We said. Aizen frowned at us. I was not going down! Not here! Not now! This was not how things would end! I looked at Aizen who was especially staring at me and I too ran away after Ulquiorra.

"I'll catch him, so you can punish him. BYE!" I wiped the sweat off my brow. That had been a little too close for comfort. Ulquiorra was waiting for me. He stopped my run and looked at me.

"What is it?" He asked me.

"What is what?"

"The green thiiiiing." He whined. I slapped him.

"What the hell are you talking about?!"

"This." He smiled and released his cero, collapsing a wall. I frowned. That wasn't good. That downright sucked. He smiled bigger.

"What is it?"

"A-a-a-a-a c-cero."

"Cerooooooo. I likey." He said firing off another. He hit another wall. His face was a mix of happiness and mischief. I put my hands on his shoulders.

"Now, Ulqui, let's not do anything stupid. J-just walk with me. N-no! Put your finger down! ULQUI!!!"

Right in my chest. And at such a close range. I looked at the blood run out and over. I put my hand over it. I looked back up at Ulquiorra who was now in tears.

"I sorry! I not mean to do it! I not mean to!"

"What is going on over here!?" Aizen called up. He didn't sound too happy. Behind him were Halibel and Nnoitra who were both making faces at the scene. Aizen looked at me. He looked at Ulquiorra. He looked at the blood.

"Come on Grimmjow…All over the floor!" He said gesturing towards the blood. I scoffed.

"Excuse me for bleeding after getting my chest shot through with a cero."

"Ceroooooooooo." Ulquiorra said. I glared at him. He looked away. Aizen looked at Ulquiorra who was shifting forward and backward on his heels. Aizen put his hand on his forehead. He looked at us.

"Who can tell me why Ulquiorra is now a ditz?" He asked. We all raised our hands. Mine went up shakily. I mean, I was still bleeding over here. Is no one going to help me? Really? Nobody at all sees the guy with blue hair bleeding to death? Guess not. Aizen asks Halibel what happened.

"Grimmjow could tell you better than I could." she said. He looked at me. I looked left and right. I was dreading this moment. I grinned.

"Er…how's it going Aizen? See any good movies lately?"

He glared. I guess that plan of distraction wasn't going to work.

"C-can we stop the bleeding first at least?" I asked. Halibel knelt over me and patched me up. For a woman, she wasn't half bad. I sat on the floor and looked up at Aizen.

"I wanted him to clean my room."

"Cleaning baaaaaad." Ulquiorra scowled. I shushed him.

"He wouldn't do it, so I guess I maybe did something to offend him. He chased me to the point where I reached my room. When he tried to come in, I slammed my door…it hit him…in the head…"

"He has amnesia!" Nnoitra finished.

"Amnesiiiiiiiiiaaaaaaaaaaaa." Ulquiorra chuckled. Aizen looked at him and shook his head.

"I'm getting too old for this…We have to find a way to bring him back to his old self." He said.

"How do we that?"

"Oh, nothing too hard." He smiled. We gulped. The look in his eyes told us this was no easy task.

Another great chapter. Spazzy Ulqui is the best! Love that guy, but serios Ulqui is just as good too. Hope you enjoyed the chapter! Please review!


	5. Return His Memory

Memory Return

As much as I loved to smile, you think I would get joy at the pain and suffering of both Grimmjow and my girlfriend, Halibel, but I wasn't… because they dragged me into it. I mean, the whole thing started with a door. That's a Juno moment. It started with a door. Yup, definitely a Juno moment. Anyhoo, Ulquiorra was a psychotic freak, and we had to fix him. Now even Aizen was helping. He said familiar sights and sounds and even smells could bring back a person's memories. That's what we did. First, we took him to Aizen's room since he had to clean it. Grimmjow said Ulquiorra had just cleaned the room, but what I saw was a pig sty. It was worser n' my room. Aizen dragged Ulquiorra to the middle of the room.

"Bring back any memories?" I asked. Aizen shushed me.

"We have to do this delicately, Nnoitra. Ulquiorra?"

He looked back and gave Aizen a goofy grin.

"Does any of this look familiar?" He asked in a cooing kind of way. I rolled my eye.

"I see…a mess that should be cleaned." Ulquiorra laughed. I shuddered. Ulquiorra should never laugh or smile. He looked at me.

"I see a spoon who needs…ceeeerrrrreeeeeaaallll."

My eye twitched. I lunged for him. Halibel and Grimmjow grabbed me.

"I'm going to kill him!! He called me a spoon!"

"_Everyone_ calls you a spoon." They said. I blinked. I was not aware. Did my hood look that bad where people called me a spoon? Did it look that bad? I think it looks cool. I smiled. They released me. Ulquiorra pointed at Halibel.

"I see a woman who needs a new uniform. Buuuusssstttyyyy."

Halibel leaped; I stopped her. She kicked in my arms.

"Nnoitra…release me so I can show Ulquiorra who needs a new uniform."

"A new uniform wouldn't hurt babe. I feel like sleeping with you every time I see you." I frowned.

"You think that anyway…" She growled.

"…A new uniform would settle me."

"Liar. That's a bunch of malarkey."

I let go. Aizen sighed.

"This isn't working. Any other plac-" He stopped his words. Ulquiorra was twisting that single strand in Aizen's face around his finger. Aizen looked at him. Ulquiorra just twisted.

"Why you gotssa' one piece?" He asked dreamily. This was disturbing. I grabbed Ulquiorra and dragged him away from Aizen. He kicked and screamed. We had to yell just to hear each other.

"JUST LET HIM GO!!!" They told me.

"IF I DO THAT, HE'LL PLAY WITH AIZEN'S HAIR AGAIN!!!!" I yelled back. Ulquiorra hit me in the face. I was so tempted to put my hands on either side of his neck and twist.

"JUST LET HIM GO!! MY EARS ARE DYING!!"

"FINE!" I let Ulquiorra go. He crossed his arms and turned his back on me.

"Mean spoon." He pouted.

"Ugh, let's take him to the kitchen. He washes the dishes."

And so we did. That was not a perfect place. There was more whipped cream in there, and Ulquiorra wasted all ten bottles by spraying them all over us and counters and tables. He gave Aizen the silliest Santa beard. It was hilarious…until he sprayed me right in the face, in my eye where it burned. The kitchen was a disaster area when we left. While Ulquiorra sang off tune to Ayumi Hamasaki's Butterfly, we pondered what to do next.

"Where can we take him next?" I asked.

"The break room?" Grimmjow shrugged. Aizen hmphed.

"We might be looking at this wrong." He said.

"What do you mean Lord Aizen?" Halibel asked.

"We are taking him to places where he works. We need to take him to a place that really hits him here." He pounded his chest where his heart was.

"We can take him to the spot where he killed Ichigo." Grimmjow suggested.

"He did almost die there." I nodded. We agreed. Ulquiorra was now singing Halloween by Aqua. I groaned.

"Make him shut up!"

"HALLOWEEN!!! Is the fear that I fight in my dreams!!!!"

"SHUT UP!!!!"

We dragged Ulquiorra to the top of Las Noches. His horrible singing stopped instantly. He looked at us with fear.

"I don't like this place. Take me away."

We shook our heads.

"Explore. It'll be fun." I laughed. He shivered and walked forwards. He looked back; we motioned him on. He looked both left and right. He froze for a second. Then he ran back and tackled Grimmjow to the ground.

"I don'ts like this place! I wanna' go!!"

"You have to stay." Halibel pat his head. He frowned.

"I d-don't wa-wanna' stay!" He teared up. I wanted to slap him. Aizen sighed.

"We can't let him start crying again."  
"But he has to get his memory back." Grimmjow said.

"But he doesn't like it up here." Halibel said to him.

"He needs to get over it and explore." Grimmjow snarled at us.

"Shut up, Grimmjow. We'll just take him." I said. He mumbled and sighed.

"Fine, we'll take him away. What do we do now?"

We all shrugged. Aizen clapped his hands together.

"I've got it! Maybe Szayel can come up with something to reverse this."

Halibel, Grimmjow, and I all looked uneasy. I looked away. How was this going to play out…?

* * *

Ulqui had a serious moment…sort of. I hope you enjoyed this chapter as well. 8)


	6. Additional Help

**Disclaimer: **This is the first time I've put this in a story...I DON'T OWN ANY CHARACTERS...not even Ulqui... :(

* * *

Additional Help

Okay, I had to admit that my arrancar children had never acted this stupid before. I mean, how does one go along into giving amnesia to another Espada? By arrancar children, I meant Grimmjow. I cannot believe he gave Ulquiorra amnesia. I can't believe Ulquiorra is a total spazz. I can't believe we actually have to go see Szayel about this. I suggested it, but truthfully, I was scared of him. Too late to complain since we were already knocking on the door. He answered with his usual creeper smile on his face. He smiled especially at us men.

"Well, this _is_ an unexpected surprise!"

"Yeah, yeah, we need a favor." Nnoitra grumbled. Szayel flipped his hair.

"What's the favor?"

"Before we ask you the favor, here's the problem." We pushed Ulquiorra to him. Szayel raised an eyebrow.

"What's wrong with this sexy…I mean, what's wrong with Ulquiorra?" He shifted his eyes back and forth. I raised my brow. I knew it. I stepped back. Ulquiorra just stared at Szayel.

"Say something, Ulquiorra." I said. He smiled showing off his teeth.

"FAGGOT!!!" He yelled pointing repeatedly at Szayel who was very shocked.

"Uhm…well…" Szayel put his hand in his hair. He looked at me.

It was an awkward silence besides Ulquiorra's off key singing. Now he was singing Kokoro by Kagamine Rain. A song that contains a lot of high notes. It was worse a torture than anything I could imagine. Szayel cleared his throat.

"Lord…Aizen?" He wanted to ask but could not.

"I would ask Grimmjow." I eyed Grimmjow, my new least favorite Espada. He ruined Ulquiorra! He was the only one who could fold my coats just like I liked them!

"Er…a chase, a door…now this…" He rubbed the back of his neck. Szayel nodded.

"I'm guessing amnesia? Alright, we can fix this." He took Ulquiorra's hand. "I will do some tests that require me and him…alone."

I shuddered. That's the last thing I wanted.

"Szayel…" I started, but he cut me off with the wag of a gloved finger.

"Ah, ah, I'm the scientist. I know what I'm doing. Oh yes I do." His smile grew and his eyes gleamed. Oh. My. GOSH. He pulled Ulquiorra into the room and slammed the door in our faces. I could feel my common sense yelling at me to do something. Halibel tapped me. I looked at her.

"You do know…"

"I know." I almost sobbed. Nnoitra blinked.

"If I had another eye behind this eye patch, I wouldn't believe what I think I saw."

Grimmjow looked pale.

"I…hate…Szayel…" He said putting his hand over his mouth.

"So do we…" The rest of us said. We heard a loud yell come from the room. I covered my eyes.

"My child!!!"

"My brother!!" Halibel said.

"Why didn't you leave Szayel as a regular Hollow?" Nnoitra asked me.

"I didn't know it would be like this!"

"He's a _butterfly_." Grimmjow snapped at me. I narrowed my eyes.

"Watch that tone Frenchie. I'm still mad at you."

He kept himself from screaming. Another inside yell.

"It was an accident! I didn't expect him to try and come in…"

Yet another yell. I could bear this no longer. I kicked the door in. I sighed. Oh man, it wasn't what I thought after all. Grimmjow and Nnoitra started laughing from behind me. Halibel coughed into her hand.

"Having fun, Ulquiorra?" I asked. He looked back and smiled at me.

"YEAH!" He smiled. He had Szayel tied to the wall. Ulquiorra had been throwing scalpels at him. It was like those people who blind fold themselves and throw sharp shit at spinning victims. Szayel screamed as another scalpel flew between his legs.

"Lord Aizen! Please stop this!" He begged. I smiled and crossed my arms. Ulquiorra threw a knife that landed right above his head.

"No talking for you." He said in a demonic voice. Halibel took the scalpels away from him, after we watched him throw five more, and led him out of the room. I made Nnoitra untie Szayel. It was sad to see him go free, but he had rights…unfortunately.

"So, how do we fix him?"

Szayel dusted himself off. He glared at us.

"You left me tied up there while he threw knives at me."

"Yeah, so how do we fix him?"

"You can all go to hell." He flipped his hair and walked away. Well, that was most certainly not good. Halibel exhaled hard.

"We should have helped him…" she said crossing her arms across her breasts. Grimmjow punched a hole in the wall.

"Damn! We need to get Ulquiorra back to normal!"

"What do you suppose we do? It's your fault he's like this." I said. He looked at me pointing his finger, holding his breath, and scowling. He exhaled feeling much better.

"I am not going to say anything, but I do have an idea."

"Tell us!" Nnoitra urged. Grimmjow smiled.

"He got amnesiastic when I hit him with the door, right?"

"Yes, on with it man!" I said.

"What if I were to hit him again? Wouldn't that do just the opposite?"

I smiled. It was so stupid and illogical, it just might work. Ulquiorra looked at us.

"Hit me with a' door!?" He squealed. He shook his head wildly. "NO NO!"

"It's for the good of the dome." I sang. He stopped and smiled.

"I love the dome."

"You love the dome?"

"Yeeeaah."

"Wanna' save the dome?"

"Uh-huh."

"Wanna' know how?"

"HOW?"

"You gotta' get hit in the face with a door." I waited for his reaction.

"LET'S DO IT!!!!!!!" He yelled and giggled.

* * *

Ah, Amnesia-induced Ulqui. He's so cute…^_^

Hope you liked this chapter. Chapter 6? I have lots of work to do… -_-

NO MATTER!!! I LOVE THIS STORY!!!! ^_^


	7. Even More Craziness and Randomness

Even More Confusion and Randomness

I guess I should count myself lucky that I was not the one that had to slam the door. I had already done it once. On accident! I sighed. Being an awesome French cat…panther could be hard at times. It was really hard when you do something on accident, but everyone insists it was on purpose even though you keep telling them it was an accident but they just won't listen because they're really stupid and like to piss you off. Whatever, what mattered now is that Ulquiorra was standing behind a door with Nnoitra in the position to slam it. His smile had spread from ear to ear ever since he learned he would be the one to do the slamming. Aizen stood next to Ulquiorra telling him everything was okay. Yes, yes, everything was going to be okay because he was about to be hit with a door. Great. Now _I'll_ feel safe whenever I see a door coming at my face. Halibel was growling at Nnoitra telling him to go easy on him. I rolled my eyes.

"Are we ready?" I groaned. They all looked at me. Aizen and Halibel sighed.

"Sure, I guess we are." They stepped back. I looked at Nnoitra who pulled the door back; we all sucked in some air. Nnoitra let it rip. The crack was clearly audible. We all clenched our teeth when we heard it, well, not Nnoitra. he was laughing.

"That oughta' give him his memory back!" He said. Ulquiorra was sitting on the ground. The area around his nose was red. He blinked. We sucked in more air and looked at him waiting for him to say something smart and insulting. He scowled at us.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing hitting me with a damn door! DAMN! That fucking hurts!!"

We groaned. He was more like Nnoitra now! Halibel glared at Nnoitra. He crossed his arms.

"Damn, don't look at me." He scoffed. Aizen blinked.

"Now what?"

"Maybe Halibel should try?" I shrugged. Ulquiorra laughed once.

"That fucking woman can get in the damn kitchen and make me a sandwich." He rubbed his nose. Halibel tried to reach for him. I had to hold her back.  
"You immoral, sexist schmuck! I'll kill you! Let me go, Grimmjow!"

"You can't kill him. That's _my_ job." Aizen said. She groaned and stopped squirming. Instead she shook my grip, walked to the door, smiled at Ulquiorra, and slammed the door right in his face. OUCH. Another loud crack. If his Hollow bone didn't break, he'd have one huge headache in the morning. Ulquiorra looked around. He looked at me, got up, and hugged me.

"Toto! I don't think we're in Kansas any more!" He shrieked. I looked at me.

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"Just look how different it is here! This can't be Kansas." He looked at Aizen.

"Run Toto! It's the Wicked Witch of the West!"

I slapped him.

"Get a hold of yourself!"

"Looky here!" He looked at Nnoitra. "If it isn't the Tin man."

Nnoitra stepped back.

"Someone hit him." he mouthed. We shrugged. He was too far away from the door.

"Do something. He's trying to oil me."

Halibel chuckled. It was nice seeing Nnoitra tortured for a change. Ulquiorra looked back at her.

"It's the Witch's henchman! The flying monkey!!"

Halibel's eyes flashed open. There was a fire in her eyes. Aizen grabbed Ulquiorra.

"Come along, er, Dorothy. it's time to get you back to Kansas."

"No! You're evil!!!"

"No, I'm the White Witch."

"You killed Aslan!!"

Where was he getting all of this from? What the hell was he talking about? Aizen managed to knock Ulquiorra unconscious, so he would stop talking about his nonsense. We all leaned against the wall.

"This is unbearable." Aizen said.

I nodded.

"We need some way to bring him back to normal." Nnoitra closed his eye.

"I want to kill him." Halibel snarled.

"You can't kill my favorite Espada." Aizen said. All three of us looked at him.

"Favorite?"

"I mean, my fourth Espada. Yes, of course."

"You suck." Nnoitra frowned.

"…" Ulquiorra snored. We looked at him and smiled.

"Actually, he's cute having amnesia." Halibel said.

"He's harder to handle, though." Aizen pointed out.

"I can't have a fair fight with him if he's got no memory." I said annoyed.

"Actually, if he's stupid, we all move one up the Espada chain." The smile returned to Nnoitra's face. I nodded.

"This is true." I smiled at the thought of being five. I frowned. I loved my number six, as inaccurate as it was. I was the Primera, but no one listens to my opinions. I huffed and slid t=down the wall into a sitting position.

"There's NO place like home…" Ulquiorra continued to talk in his sleep. Halibel awed. We all gagged.

"We could just do what Nnoitra did to Nel, and abandon Ulquiorra in the desert." Aizen said. I gasped in fake shock. MOCK SHOCK!

"You would desert your favorite Espada?" I asked. He groaned.

"What good is he if he can't do work?"

We all acknowledged the truth in this.

"Yeah, sure, let's do it." We said. Aizen smiled and we picked up Ulquiorra.

* * *

NOOOOO!!! They're casting out Ulqui! Oh well, he has amnesia anyway. It's probably worse now…he did get hit, like, two, three, more times? Ah, well. The next chapter is very serious. Please review. You know you want to.


	8. Short Desert Experience

Short Desert Experience

I woke up. I am in sand. WOW. I looks around. It's sandy…sandy, sandy, sandy. Left and right. Where did those other people go? Didn't they like me? Where am I exactly? It's gotta' be a desert, yeah. I stood up and put my finger to my lip. Ams I lost? Ams I dead? No-ey, no, no. I can see a dome. I r'member! I was gonna' save the dome! Yeah…my head hurt. I crossed my arms. It was no fair trickins me like that! I pout. Left and right. Nothin' but stupid sand. I guess this maybe be another task. I walk the opposite direction where the dome is. They don' need me, I don' need them. I keep walking. My head really hurts. My nose feels almost bwoken. I wanna' cry. They left me ta' die in a desert. Thought they was my friends. No friends in this world…_There is no meaning to those of us living in the world. _ What was that? It sounded like my voice, but…more scawy…and sewious. I scared now 'cause I think I've heard that before. Somewhere. I shakes my head. I must be havin' one of those hallucinogens…no, hallelujahs. Something like that. I continue my walk. This sand is really nice to walk on. I need to pass the time. I think I would be here for awhile. I stop and pout. At least the domey place had fun things to play with like whipped cream, and pink haired people, and knives, and spoons. I sigh. This is boring. I don't like to be bored. Oh, it's a little Hollow lizard. Ew, but I wanted to eat it. I turn my back. Yuck. Eating Hollows is nasty.

"_**What is this? A little Hollow?**_"

I look behind me. There is a giant bird like Hollow thing behind me. I gulp. This guy was huuuuuuuuuuge. He was bigger than the sand dune next to me. He smiled showing off a row of sharp teeth.

"_**I would just like to tell you the bad news first.**_"

"What?" I asked dully. He tilted his head.

"_**I shall dine upon your flesh, so that I may become a Vasto Lorde.**_"

He lunged and I cartwheeled out of the way.

"Wazza' Vasto Lorde?" I asked before he could attack again.

"_**I see no harm in telling you. You shall be dead soon anyway. A Vasto Lorde is the strongest kind of Hollow.**_"

I nod. I understand. I smile showing my teeth. He laughs and grabs for me. I backflip out of his reach.

"_**You are somewhat amusing. What is your name?**_"

"Uhm…What did those guys' say? Oh! I am Ulquiorra."

The Hollow fell backwards and scoot back using his arms. He frowned. It looked like he was going to cry or something. He put his arms out to me.

"_**I-I-I apologize Master Ulquiorra! I did not recognize you!! Please, f-forgive my behavior!**_"

I tilt my head. I ams confuzzled.

"Whatcha' talkin' bout?" I smile. He blinks. He puts a finger to my chest.

"_**You're Ulquiorra Schiffer.**_"

"Yes. I think…now."

"_**You live right over there.**_" He pointed at the dome. I nodded.

"They kicked me out."

"_**I see. You will wander this desert forever.**_"

"Yeah. Okay, bye." I waved and left him. He pulled me back around.

"_**I would be honored to escort you.**_"

I looked him over. His dull, yellow eyes reminded me of something I knew. Hm, maybe it was just me. I allowed him to accompany me. He followed me gladly wherever I went. He often talked, and we often stopped to feed on a Hollow or two. They were delectably delicious! We kept moving. He must have been happy that we were travelin together 'cause he smiled a lot more. I liked to smile, so it was no big deal. It was funny. As I traveled with him and ate Hollows, I saw a lot of stuff flash in my head like a puzzle. A puzzle being solved. I stopped for a moment when I saw flashes of this desert. My new buddy, Quilkerah, was there to relax me. I was starting to become uneasy. I thought I was going crazy. Then I saw Quilkerah attack a Hollow ferociously and eat it. I froze. My mind went crazy. My face went emotionless.

* * *

Short, sweet, and to the point.

Sorry, no fun and games in this

I still expect reviews ;)


	9. Regret

Regret

This was too weird. I felt so bad inside ever since we stranded Ulquiorra outside. I mean, I never felt guilt and hear I was pacing the floor in my room with my arms crossed sweating bullets! I couldn't shake the feeling. What if a Hollow came across Ulquiorra while he was like this and ate him? I hated the guy, sure, but death by getting eaten? What a horrible way to go. He should be dying by my hands!!! I growled and kicked the wall. I should really come up with a better way to get rid of my anger. I heard a knock on my door. I answered it. Nnoitra and Halibel stood there.

"Hey, we're watching a movie from the human world in the break room. You coming?" Halibel asked.

"How can you guys be so calm? We just threw Ulquiorra out!" I said. They looked at each other.

"Grimmjow, I don't really want to admit this, but me and Halibel have felt nauseous ever since we dumped Ulquiorra out there." Nnoitra put a hand on his stomach. I sighed with relief. At least I wasn't the only one.

"What about Aizen?" I asked quickly. They shook their heads in disgust.

"He just left to go find a Vasto Lorde to replace Ulquiorra." They spit. I clenched my teeth. Aizen was, is, a prick.

"What a jerk…" I mumbled. They nodded.

"Yeah, so wanna' see the movie?"

"What human movie is it?" I asked carefully. I had seen a few since the Soul Society fell to us, and almost none were that good.

"Uh, what is it? Transformers?" Halibel asked Nnoitra. He nodded.

"It's about some alien robots who go to earth and start a war with some other alien robots because they want power…Something like that."

It sounded okay, so we went. We enetered the break room where every Espada and their Fraccion were gathered. Well, Barragan wasn't there. We three felt uneasy but it would be okay as long as no one asked. Yammy came up to us.

"Hey! Haven't seen you guys for the longest."

"Y-yeah, hey Yammy." We greeted him. He scratched his bald, ridged head.

"I haven't seen Ulquiorra anywhere either. You guys seen him?"

"N-no! N-not at all."

"Dang, I really wanted him to see this."

"Why?"

"His depressing speech don't have nothing on this movie!"

"Oh…well. see ya." we tried to get past him, but he moved in our way.

"No, no, you guys have to sit with me if he's not here. Just don't hit me in the stomach." He smiled then burst into loud laughter. We sort of laughed. We sat down and the movie started. I couldn't help but wince at the death of Jazz seeing how the cruelty took my mind to Ulquiorra. I could just see a Hollow coming up to Ulquiorra and ripping him in two. Nnoitra was covering his eyes and shaking his head. Halibel was trying to comfort him, but she was sweating.

Finally, the torture ended. We were the first to stand up. Yammy smiled.

"No one leave! I got the _second_ one!"

Everyone cheered. We sat and cried. This one was worse. The big Optimus guy was being beat around by the veil people. I could still picture that being Ulquiorra being beat around. I leaned over.

"We have to get outta' here." I whispered to Nnoitra. He didn't look at me. I tapped him. He wouldn't respond. I turned him around. He was crying.

"I-I c-can't stop thinking about h-him! He was s-s-so w-w-w-w-w-weak!!!!" He sobbed quietly. Halibel sniffed.

"It's okay, Nnoitra. He'll be fine. He'll be fine."

"H-How can you say that!" I asked trying to keep myself from crying. Then I looked at the screen and saw the leader of the evil robots stab Optimus right through his chest. I lost it. I put my head down and cried as did Halibel. Yammy looked over at us.

"Damn…you guys take your movies way too seriously…"

We eventually just left the room. We wiped our tears and blew our noses. We refused to go back to the break room. We sat in a small circle by the door to Las Noches. We kept sniffing, trying not to cry.

"I remember when I first met him…" I started. "H-he was so annoying…so annoying! He wouldn't even talk to me…" I smiled. Those were good times.

"Oh y-yeah?" Nnoitra smiled just to keep from frowning. "He was so tired of my jabbering, he smacked me. Th-that's how we first met."

"Neither of us talked. We are b-both silent types…" Halibel had to put her hand over her eyes. We all let out a loud cry.

"What is wrong with you three?" Someone asked.

"WE'RE SO SORRY!!!!" We cried.

* * *

They are so guilty right now! :(

Whatever, it's their own fault...or am I just being one-sided right now? :)

REVIEW!!!!


	10. The End, With a Twist

The End With a Twist

I blinked. Wait a second…who had just said that just now? I looked away from Halibel and Nnoitra who were wiping their tears. We all looked up and saw…ULQUIORRA!! We stood up instantly and hugged him. We cried even more. I might have been crying the loudest, though…dang. That is just pathetic. I looked at Ulquiorra's face. He was emotionless. He was normal. I stepped out of the hug. All eyes were on me.

"Hold on. Are you…?"

He punched me right in my face before I could really finish. I grabbed my face and held in a scream. He put his hands in his pockets.

"What was that for?" I asked still growling in pain. He scoffed.

"You hit me with a door and didn't expect me to get you back?" He said. I rolled my eyes.

"Maybeeeee…"

Halibel intersected the conversation.  
"Wait, wait, wait, how on earth did you get your memory back!?" She asked. He looked at her with his eyes only.

"I guess after the…amnesia." He glared at me. "I was in the desert and met a Hollow. His name was Quilkerah. I saw some brutality from him, and it made me remember that I was an Espada. That discovery led to the recovery of my memory."

We all nodded. Nnoitra pat Ulquiorra on his back.

"It's great to have you back!" He smiled. Ulquiorra turned away.

"Don't lay your hands on me, trash."

Nnoitra frowned.

"I can't believe we actually cried over you." He snapped. Ulquiorra closed his eyes.

"It was not me who told you to cry."

"You think you're really smart, dontcha'?"

"I didn't know it would take you so long to figure that out. Wait, I did."

"You little bastard." Nnoitra put a fist up. Halibel stopped him.

"Hey, hey, we just got him back."

I laughed once.

"Nnoitra could never beat Ulquiorra!"

Ulquiorra opened his eyes. It was as if he was agreeing with me. Maybe he was. Nnoitra scowled.

"You don't think!" He punched for Ulquiorra who just moved aside, grabbed the arm, and flipped the spoon onto his back. Nnoitra blinked and blew the hair out of his face.

"Lucky shot…"

"HEY! We have to tell Aizen!"

"What?" Ulquiorra asked me. I nodded.

"Yeah, Aizen was going to replace you."

"Figures…" He sighed. "Let's go find him."

But before we could find Aizen, he found us. His arms were stretched wide open and pulled Ulquiorra into a hug.

"I felt the reiatsu, but I didn't think it could possibly be true!" He laughed. Ulquiorra eyed him.

"You were going to replace me."

"NONSENSE!" He laughed louder than necessary. I put my finger in my ear.

"Quiet down, jeez."

"Yu should be glad Ulquiorra is back Grimmjow. I'm sure he hates you plenty."

I crossed my arms.

"So what? It's not like we're friends."

"Yeah, none of us really like each other here except for me and Nnoitra." Halibel pointed out. Aizen pulled away from Ulquiorra and put his arms into a shrug.

"So, what? Is that it? We all pretend nothing happened and go back to hating each other?"

"Pretty much." We all said. Aizen blinked and narrowed his eyes.

"That sounds like a bad ending to a funny story."

"It very well could be."

"It can't end on such a pathetic note." He threw his head back. I walked away and came back with a pot from the kitchen. I walked up to Aizen and hit him on his head with it. He fell to the ground unconscious. The other three looked at me.

"ARE YOU CRAZY!?" Nnoitra said putting his hands over his mouth.

"Grimmjow, that was unnecessary." Ulquiorra sighed.

"He is going to kill you." Halibel looked at Aizen. I shrugged.

"It's a happy ending."

Silence. Halibel shook Aizen. He sat up with her help.

"Are you okay Lord Aizen?" Ulquiorra asked. Aizen smiled his smile.

"I'm perfectly fine. One question: Who's Aizen?"

They all gasped. Here we go again! At least this time, you can say I did it on purpose!

The End,

Unless I decide to make the sequel, Aizen Forgot

I hope you all enjoyed this story. I had a blast writing it. I'm glad Ulquiorra is all better, how could he not be? If you want to know what happened to Quilkerah, I'll tell you. Ulquiorra invited him back to the dome, so Aizen could make him into an arrancar. Sadly, Aizen has just acquired amnesia because of Grimmjow :(


End file.
